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Planet of the Mice



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By : Mark Etinger   

Science fiction has long toyed with idea of a world where humans are not at the top of the food chain. Films like Planet of the Apes, Jurassic Park, and Predators all operate in a fictional reality in which another race or species, by use of mental superiority or brute force, has overcome humans. Although we often think it will be angry apes or aliens who will destroy us (if we don't destroy ourselves first) it could easily be mice. What if mice grew as large as dinosaurs, as smart as genetically enhanced apes, and decided to take the earth back from humans? Join me while I play out this dystopian fantasy in a scenario so wild it just may be true.

Picture if you will a massive city. Not massive in the same way New York City is massive but a city where van sized mice roam the streets going about their business and the humans must hide underground and in the walls. A city that stretches miles into the air and hundreds of miles across. We are in Rodentopolis and the year is 2224.

Mice would employ mouse glue traps (or human glue traps as they would call them) to catch humans who would steal their food. Humans would constantly be killed or trapped by mouse traps. By mouse traps of course I mean traps sprung on humans by enormous and intellectually superior mice.

Humans would be forced to hunt for the scraps of food left behind by these uber-mice at night. It would be risky because if the super mice would see the humans scurrying across their floor they would try to step on them.

The mice would have detailed history books that described the dark days of mouse kind. The days when mice were killed in mouse glue traps. The days when mice were dumb and scared seeing their kind endlessly slaughtered by mouse traps.

But then a charismatic escaped lab rat united the rodents and taught them to grow enormous in size and intellectual prowess. The mouse traps of old no longer worked on these mice. Neither did the combined armies of all the world. And so the mice took over and the humans had to go underground.

Although this scenario is purely fictional, it could happen. That is why it is important to use mouse glue traps to control the pest population now. We don't know when evolution will throw us a curveball. Better safe than sorry.

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